Never would I have anticipated that someone would write an antithesis of Psalm 23. The poem is ‘interesting’ when juxtaposed with the original Psalm 23, but bleakness of life (or is it death?) portrayed in the antipsalm is quite terrifying.
It’s so good to call the Lord as my shepherd, and for me to be His sheep.
Antipsalm 23
I’m on my own.
No one looks out for me or protects me.
I experience a continual sense of need. Nothing’s quite right.
I’m always restless. I’m easily frustrated and often disappointed.
It’s a jungle — I feel overwhelmed. It’s a desert — I’m thirsty.
My soul feels broken, twisted, and stuck. I can’t fix myself.
I stumble down some dark paths.
Still, I insist: I want to do what I want, when I want, how I want.
But life’s confusing. Why don’t things ever really work out?
I’m haunted by emptiness and futility — shadows of death.
I fear the big hurt and final loss.
Death is waiting for me at the end of every road,
but I’d rather not think about that.
I spend my life protecting myself. Bad things can happen.
I find no lasting comfort.
I’m alone … facing everything that could hurt me.
Are my friends really friends?
Other people use me for their own ends.
I can’t really trust anyone. No one has my back.
No one is really for me — except me.
And I’m so much all about ME, sometimes it’s sickening.
I belong to no one except myself.
My cup is never quite full enough. I’m left empty.
Disappointment follows me all the days of my life.
Will I just be obliterated into nothingness?
Will I be alone forever, homeless, free-falling into void?
Sartre said, “Hell is other people.”
I have to add, “Hell is also myself.”
It’s a living death,
and then I die.
My foundation class looked at the issue of diligence and laziness in Proverbs in Oct/Nov 08, and I revisited the issue with some Christian colleagues recently through the reading of C.J Mahaney’s blog series on Biblical Productivity. You know what? Most of the content really aren’t new and can even be found in secular books. Still, God is using the series to remind me of my stewardship of time, e.g. not stealing time at work (otherwise I’m a thief), planning my time (I ABHOR planning, even though organising seems to be my gift. Actually I think I abhor planning because I don’t keep to my plans - but that’s another form of laziness…), not procrastinating (though I dread the work that’s on my plate), etc. It’s really, really tough, but I think there’s something that I have to learn from here, so that I can be really fruitful in my work.
During last sat’s Adult Fellowship, we looked at verses on heaven and hell, judgment, punishment and reward - topics which we don’t really discuss, and perhaps prefer not to think of most of the time. But it’s difficult not to bring up these sobering verses when we are looking at bringing the good news of Jesus Christ to others.
During the session, we also viewed a clip where people shared of their near death experiences and terrifying accounts of visions of hell. Then there were interviews of people in the street, some of which believed in heaven but not hell, or either. Some didn’t believe that there’s something after death, while others just think that heaven is just a state of mind. Even though the clip was from the US, I’m not surprised if these are the prevailing opinions of people in Singapore as well. But these are made even more frightening when the accounts of hell are juxtaposed with people’s apathy in judgment and the destiny of their souls. Yet, what can we expect from a society that thinks morality is arbitary and truth is relative?
“‘You will not surely die’, the serpent said to the woman”, which is of course the first recorded contradiction of something God said. And the first thing to be denied is the doctrine of judgment. Once we eliminate judgment, once we eliminate sanctions, it is easier to challenge God’s authority across the board ’cause there are no nasty entailments.
That was the first lie that man believed in: that there is no judgment. No wonder till now, we humans have still succumbed to the same deception of the evil one, that there is no one to account to, and there will be no consequences to our choices and actions. Yet it’s no longer about personal opinions or preferences, for God’s word is our reference.
Take me where I’ve never been
Help me on my feet again Show me that good things come to those who wait
Tell me I’m not on my own
Tell me I won’t be alone
Tell me what I’m feeling isn’t some mistake
‘Cause if anyone can make me fall in love, you can
Save me from myself, you can
And it’s you and no one else
If I could wish upon tomorrow tonight would never end If you asked me I would follow
But for now I’ll just pretend
‘Cause if anyone can make me fall in love, you can
Baby, when you look at me
Tell me what do you see
Are these the eyes of someone you could love?
‘Cause everything that brought me here
Well, now it all seems so clear
Baby, you’re the one that I’ve been dreaming of
If anyone can make me fall in love, you can
Save me from myself, you can
And it’s you and no one else
If I could wish upon tomorrow tonight would never end
If you asked me I would follow
But for now I’ll just pretend
‘Cause if anyone can make me fall in love
Only you can take me sailing in your deepest eyes
Bring me to my knees and make me cry
And no one’s ever done this
Everything was just a lie and I know, yes, I know
This is where it all begins
So tell me it will never end
I can’t fool myself, it’s you and no one else
If I could wish upon tomorrow tonight would never end
If you asked me I would follow
But for now I’ll just pretend
‘Cause if anyone can make me fall in love, you can
To tell the truth, I haven’t heard D.A. Carson speak before today. But given the laud from John Piper and other preachers, I had a good feeling that he’s a speaker with solid, Biblical messages. He has a series of messages on temptation (of Adam and Eve, Joseph, Hezekiah, Jesus, and lastly, our temptation). If you don’t know what to do during your long journeys, why not listen to these?
